That Time I Quit Social Media For a Week

Monday night, last week, I shared a post to Instagram and Facebook declaring my intentions to take a week-long break from those platforms. I mentioned feeling apprehensive about it, because I often use Instagram as an escape when I'm feeling overwhelmed, and going into last week, I expected to be very overwhelmed. 

Here's what I knew about the upcoming week: The older kids had just gotten out of school for summer, Boss was headed out of town for work leaving Tuesday morning and returning Friday afternoon, and my sister was to start a training class on Thursday that would have her gone most of the day - and I'd already agreed to watch her three kids while she was gone.

For those reasons alone, I was kind of dreading the week. Little did I know what the week actually had in store for me. After I posted my intentions, I uninstalled Instagram and Facebook messenger from my phone and then went to bed.

I was woken early Tuesday morning, I had to drive Boss to work where he was meeting everyone he was traveling with. Not long after returning home I learned my daughter's glasses were broken and in need of repair, and I began to consider that with the other errands I needed to run before I was homebound with children on Thursday and Friday. I needed to visit Target, Walmart, and Costco - I figured we'd hit all our errands in one day since the three stores conveniently happen to be along the same street. So I wouldn't have to worry about lunch, I decided to take the kids to free lunch at the park before we got started. 

My picky children didn't eat much of their lunches, but they ate enough and they got to run around for a bit at the park with the friends and cousins who we ran into. But it was pretty warm that day, so we didn't stay long. I wanted to get back into the air conditioning of the van and to get our errands done. 

Of the three stores, Target is the farthest and Costco the closest, and because I was planning to get frozen things at Costco I thought it'd be best to start at Target and move closer to home with each stop. But we never made it to Target. 

As we made our way, I thought about the quickest way to do each stop with my 6 kids in tow. At one point I got so lost in thought that I didn't realize, until it was too late, that I was actually running a red light. I noticed the other car first and looked up to see my mistake just as we made impact. Shame and guilt and my nagging inner critic were very quick to fill my head with negativity. I apologized profusely to my children - now traumatized - and to the other driver, all but me, thankfully, unharmed. 

It took a moment after impact to realize the van was still moving.
I slammed on the break and did my best to steer, so we didn't hit tree or house.
I was startled to realize we ended up on the sidewalk.

People seemed to materialize, helping to keep track of and calm my children as we shakily made our way out of the van. Both my daughter and I lost our glasses in the impact, but my oldest was able to locate them for us. Police, firemen, and an ambulance arrived. The children were cleared by paramedics, most of their discomfort having to do with the trauma they'd just experienced.

Even though they were traumatized, they still enjoyed getting to see the emergency vehicles.
Plus, the firemen gave them all stickers and pencils! :)

I took the brunt of the impact, my left arm was bruised and banged up, my right wrist looked fine, but hurt badly to move it around, and I felt like I'd been punched hard on the left side of my back. It was recommended that I visit an ER for my injuries, which I waited to do until we'd gotten the kids home. At the ER, I had X-rays done which found no broken bones, something I'm very grateful for. Almost a week later I am still pretty sore, but it's gotten a little better every day. The van on the other hand, has been declared a total loss. 

They made me put on the dang hospital gown and hooked me up to all sorts of apparatus.

The visible injuries. These are all on my left arm.
The bruise from the first photo (top left) - on the underside of my wrist, has traveled down my arm in the days since the accident.
Top right shows the scratches on my hand and if you look close you can see the bruise that covered the top of my wrist and hand.
Bottom left, with my arm at a strange angle, shows the air-bag burn.
Bottom right is various scratches and bruises on the underside of my arm.

I later realized that Thursday - two days after this accident - marked 3 years since my last car accident, the one where I rolled our van on the freeway on my way to Phoenix from Flagstaff. And I will admit that this realization only triggered more personal shame, guilt, and criticism for having, once again, put my family in this position of being without a car at the beginning of summer. 

And that was just my first day away from Instagram. Granted it's been pretty chill since then, as I've taken it easy post-accident, but it seriously tested me in my resolve to stay off Facebook and Instagram. As of last night, though, I made it. It might well be the only victory of the week, but I'll take it.