ultrasound story

This is only the second time we've found out our baby's gender before the birth. The first four were surprises, but after my experience when S was born (read about that here), I knew I'd need some advance notice with future babes.

Because I wasn't blogging then, I'll share my experience going in for my ultrasound with number 5. It was March 7, 2014. Mr. Boss wasn't able to be there, so I had prepared an envelope with two papers, one for a girl, one for a boy. My appointment was first thing in the morning and, when I walked into the waiting room, I noticed a table with a variety of cookies. After I checked in, I went over and grabbed one, all the while thinking this is probably the greatest waiting room I've ever been to.

It wasn't long before I was called back. I was led to a room that was dimly lit, I got situated on the cot-thingy, and we got started.

I'd had  an ultrasound while pregnant with E, because they were feeling worried that I was measuring small and wanted to make sure things were okay. So, this wasn't my first ultrasound experience. Even so, it was still so amazing when a baby showed up on the screen. Perhaps it's one of those experiences that never gets old.

The tech was very friendly, she chatted with me the whole time, we made small talk and she would tell me, as much as she could, about what we were looking at as she went through the scan.

I loved how there were two screens, with one angled toward me so I could see everything the tech was seeing. And she was so accommodating, from keeping the gender secret from me and taking care of the little envelope I'd brought in, she printed out a multitude of pictures for me, and she let me take video on my phone at the end, so I'd have something besides pictures to share with Mr. Boss and the bosslings later.

*****

Flash forward to April 20, 2016. Mr. Boss was able to come to this one, so I figured we'd just find out the gender while there, and come up with a fun way to tell the kids later.

We walked into a basic waiting room and got checked in. Nothing special. We waited 10, maybe 15 minutes before we were called back, which seemed reasonable. We were led to a bright room and the tech introduced himself as an intern. I will admit, I was pretty taken aback by the idea of a male ultrasound tech, but I didn't want to be difficult or have to reschedule, so I let it be. I settled into the cot-thingy and he got started. Immediately, I noticed some major differences. For one, I couldn't see the screen at all. I could see the wonder on Mr. Boss's face, and could see some of the scan reflected on the tech's glasses, but that was it. I even tried to angle my body so I could see something on the single screen, but to no avail. Unable to see, I began mentally rearranging the room. (If they just switched things around a bit, like turning the bed around, so my head went where my feet were, then I'd be able to see.) Not only that, the intern was very quiet, concentrating, I suppose. I tried to ask questions, tried to get him to give me some idea of what was going on. He'd say a couple of words now and then, but was mostly silent.

After a while a woman walked in informing us that she was the supervisor of this intern and was coming in to see how things were going. She asked him a few questions, and even took over for a bit.

When she asked if we were okay with letting the intern get more experience Mr. Boss said we didn't mind, that we were just anxious to learn the gender of the little person squirming inside me. At that, she asked the intern if he'd gotten to that yet. He mentioned that he'd tried, but that the baby was too wiggly to get a clear shot, so he hadn't documented it. She took that opportunity to try and find it for herself. After a while she had an answer. She first asked the intern what he thought, he said it looked like a boy to him , to which she quickly agreed. Then she said that she was "pretty sure", but because he was so wiggly she didn't feel comfortable documenting it.

Mr. Boss had a very obvious look of excitement on his face as they spoke, but knowing how much I've been hoping for a girl, tried to stifle his joy and asked me how I felt. I wasn't thrilled, but I felt like I accepted it fairly quickly. I knew I'd be okay, even with another boy. I started imagining all of my favorite boy clothes that I'd get to use again, and that made it seen a little easier.

The supervisor continued with the scan, checking over all of the measurements the intern had taken and making sure to get the things he'd missed. I continued trying to subtly contort my body to see the screen and, for some reason, waited until about this time to mention that I hadn't been able to see anything. So she turned the screen ever so slightly in my direction so I could see some of the scan. I still had to contort my body to see it, but it was an improvement of sorts.

It seemed that the scan was coming to a close, but I was so unsatisfied. Both intern and supervisor agreed it was a boy, but without it documented, I was kind of dying. I asked if they'd try to find it for me, just one more time. If it couldn't be reliably documented, I knew I'd be going crazy for the rest of the pregnancy wondering if maybe they'd gotten it wrong. I asked if they'd find it, so I could, at the very least, see it with my own eyes.

Just to humor me, she went to find it again. But she couldn't find it. She seemed quite flustered as she told me she was in the right area, but she simply couldn't get a clear shot, in fact, she couldn't see anything to tell her one way or another. Suddenly she was much less sure of her initial surety that this baby was a boy, which only made me feel more crazy. I needed to know.

Finally she suggested pulling in another, more seasoned tech, saying if this one couldn't find it, we'd just have to come back in another time. I knew this would probably be my only scan, so I was feeling somewhat frantic at this point. While we waited for this other tech to come in, I got up and moved around a bit, hoping that it would coax my little one into a better position to see what I needed so badly to see.

When she walked in, I settled back down and she got right to it. She expertly moved the device around and quickly found baby's bum. And then, there it was. She turned to me and said, "without a doubt, that is a girl. I am 100% sure."

I was then sent on my merry way, with a hearty congratulations and only three pictures. They hadn't even been able to get a profile, so I got a straight-on shot of her face, one of her lips, and the "I'm a girl" shot. (You can see two of the three pictures here.) 

I walked out of there with mixed feelings. We had gotten a clear result, and it was the thrilling result that I've hoped for during every single pregnancy since miss E was born. But I also felt really disappointed with the overall experience, and the measly three pictures they'd printed out for me.

I think it was especially hard to have such a bum experience after having had such an awesome experience the last time. But these were also in two different offices, in two different states, so it's not like I could expect an identical experience. I'm just bummed and dissatisfied. But, I guess that's life.